Thursday, October 12, 2006

HomoSpiritual

Why are Christians so homophobic? I get asked that ...a lot. We cannot deny that there are some groups, who under the Christian umbrella, portray the perception that Christians hate homosexuals. It is true that Scripture does not condone homosexual relationships. There is simply no way around this. Until recently, I had never really encountered many homosexuals on a regular basis and the ones i knew, i knew from a distance. All of this changed. I was a bit surprised at how much I have encountered the homosexual issue in the emergent culture. I have never had very good Gaydar. Initially I just presumed that these guys were metro or emo. I mean its hard to tell when the latest fad is for hetero guys to wear women’s jeans. However, very quickly I began to regularly encounter males and females, who, with complete sincerity would say something like: “I’ve felt this way since I was seven.” “I wish I wasn’t like this.” “Why am I like this?” “Does this mean that I am going to have to live alone for the rest of my life?” “Can God change me?” “Can you be a Christian and gay?”

I went to seminary...i know the official party line answer to all of the above...but these... are real people. Somehow id been conditioned to think of them as the enemy and now here are people saying to me..."i wish i wasnt like this...but i am." It didnt compute w/my perceptions...Several had grown up in “normal Christian homes”. That is, they had a masculine father, were good in basketball, skateboard etc. It didn’t compute with most of my perceptions. Some did. Nevertheless, like you, I know the official answer to this question. In addition to coming to my church, some were even coming to my Bible study.

So, what did you say? (I can hear you screaming). How did you answer their questions? I’m sure that someone like James Dobson and Dave Walther (of SBC) have much better counsel on this but i was too busy to research it. Seriously. And so I figured that until I could figure it out, all I could do was love them. Befriend them even. I believe that they could sense that I was uncomfortable too, but they knew that I was real. So, what did you do? I befriended them. Welcomed them and said something like, “Yes, if you become a follower of Jesus He will indeed ask you to give up some things. But, I can tell you that even if you don’t understand it, the things that He will ask you to give up are things that will ultimately lead to your demise. He truly cares for you. I don’t deny that you have these feelings, attractions, and desires, but I do know that sex was God’s idea and that as designed by Him is exclusively for a man and wife. i know He loves you and wants what's best for you. thats all i really know."

In my very first year as a Christian I came across a really transforming verse in Luke 5. I really it like because it illustrates the blessing of just obeying Jesus even when it doesn’t make sense. The disciples had been fishing all night. They were experts at this and several knew how to make a living doing it. But in Luke 5, Jesus, a carpenter, gives them some fishing instructions. This is one case where I prefer the old KJV translation. Luke 5:5 “An Simon answering said unto him, ‘Master we have toiled all night and have taken nothing: nevertheless, at your word I will let down the net.” It is the only translation that uses the word “nevertheless.” When I first read that verse I felt convicted to say “Lord, I want to be a nevertheless Christian. I don’t understand why I cant have sex with my girlfriend. i love her. It doesn’t make sense to me, but nevertheless, I will do as you say.”

I feel that this is some of the best counsel that I can give. I don’t know what you’re dealing with I but I hope that you will obey and trust Jesus … nevertheless.

10 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I would have to agree Bobby, I have a family member living with a person of the same sex. I don't want to reject nor judge them, all I can do is love them and give it over to the Lord! They already know the Truth, they have to come to terms with God on their and His, own time. It's all in His hands, not ours. Above all He commanded us to Love, not judge nor condem. Bless the beasts and the children........ RDH :)

11:34 AM

 
Blogger Joe Gordon said...

Great observation with the 'nevertheless.'

I hope your trip went well.

4:28 PM

 
Blogger Wild Yaker said...

Hey Bobby good post.

I actually attended a church in Texas where they had a gay guy that was a missionary in Europe. He was practicing gay and they found out and pulled him back to America. The good thing is that they did it the right way and loved him still. They helped him find the truth of the situation.

I took him out to dinner and talked with him after he had went through that process, 3 years after he was pulled out of Europe. and asked him about the lifestyle and what he learned and had gone through.

What he told me was that he realized everything was a lie, and that he had invented a lie to justify everything that he did. Anyway I don't want to go through the whole conversation, but he did say that if the elders of the church had just condemned him and not loved he would have left the church.

He is now married with children and runs an outreach to other gay men. He really impressed upon my life not to condemn anyone, and meet them where they are in their life, whether they are Christian or non-Christian.

People are where they are because that is where they are... sin in their life or very little sin. It does not matter if they are Christian or not. People are where they are... to not meet them there without a judgmental attitude is a sin. You are basically saying that God loves you more than he loves them, and that is never right.

God loves a humble heart. And to be honest each of us are about a second away from falling into sin if we are honest. It is much better to live life with a bowed head and bowed heart. Forever, thankful that we ourselves are still living lives for God and still able to take that next step in the eternal race to be found worthy.

I must admit that I thought you Homospiritual post was going to be about those that are afraid of being spiritual, like me. But I do think that I have found my answer. I would still like to talk to you about it some time. I think part of the problem, is like this one, ‘super-spiritual’ people confuse spirituality with culture. So they live a life like an Amish where the current culture is ‘unspiritual’ but the culture of their parents and their childhood where they were innocent becomes ‘holy’. They therefore never have to face themselves and become a terror to everyone.

God Bless, Bobby,

-wild yaker

5:14 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bobby, that is so you. i absolutely love the way God has wired you. that's all i can really say. i love the way God has wired you.

8:35 PM

 
Blogger A.PETH said...

Great post Bobby.
I remember being @ U of A...and being in the art department...well "art department" should say enough... i remember one young man (he claimed to be gay, yet never had a relationship or would initiate one) saying to me in one of our painting classes, "I love Jesus and think he's fascinating...but I don't like Christians"...and then he did a painting of Jesus.

...i can still remember the tone in his voice..and the painting...and i think it's the tone i remember the most...
anyways, like i said before, great post.

9:32 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My pastor recently told us that several years ago he found out that his college roommate was gay. He said he never had any clue whatsoever the whole time they roomed together in college. He said the he and his friends lovingly confronted the guy with the truth (which the guy already knew). They made it clear to the guy that God did not approve of same sex relationships, but they were never rude to him. They kept in contact with him and just showed their love even though the guy wasn't responsive. Eventually, he gave his life to Christ and is now married with children and doing really well.

8:20 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bobby,
I enjoy your blogs. Could you explain to me what the "emergent culture" is? You used that phrase in your post. I have been hearing about the emergent church movement (both pro and con). I have read lots of negative things about someone named Brian McLaren and want to withhold forming any opinions until I understand what it is. Can you help explain exactly what this movement is?

1:16 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Bobby, I was in a conversation with a gay employee many years ago. His whole life was so troubled and I was attempting to share my faith with him. He said that turning to religion always made him feel guilty. I shared that coming to Christ did the exact opposite for me, because
He paid the penalty for my sins. Acceptance, PURE UNADULTERATED LOVE is what Christ provides! Also, back to the main question, why are Christians so homophobic? Often the extremely radical gays are very ugly toward Christians. They may have a good personal reason to be that way, yet many have just a mass hatred toward Christians. The term "tolerance" is often not applied back toward the Christians. In the secular world is is very "hip" to be gay and that culture as a whole "holds its nose" toward anything remotely connected with God. That's why it is SO IMPORTANT to shine Christ's light of LOVE one on one with those who are caught in that lifestyle. One by one, they are hurting sinners just like you and me, in need of the Savior. But as a big outspoken political group, they are very threatening.
Bless you bro,you are and remain the BEST!
Jenn

2:02 PM

 
Blogger TowerAZ said...

You know, I too had been kept out of close range with same-gender couples most of my life, but lately, I've been really trying to see everyone through "God's eyes". Sin is sin, so why do we think Christians shouldn't like homosexuals? That's like saying we won't associate at all with someone who lies, or gossips, or acts dishonestly to get the sale, or says they hate a neighbor, or cheats on their taxes, or over-indulges at mealtime, etc. We ALL have sinned, we ALL fall short, and God still loves ALL of us. To God, sin is sin is sin. ALL sins are wrong in His sight. None worse than any others. So let's just live lives that bring Him the glory, love others as Jesus did, and trust God to do things His way. We are not the judges, lest we too shall be judged by the same standards.

8:31 PM

 
Blogger cindi said...

B - good thoughts. You're right, in that its so different when you can label/judge a group of people that you don't know. But then God totally changes you when you hear life stories, feel people's past pain, empathize with their current struggles, and walk next to each other in friendship and love. I do know this.... love wins.

9:32 PM

 

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